Does Wilko Dream of Galactic Fleets?

In which I get hooked on strategic galactic space battles...

The Game

The original Neptune's Pride took the gaming world by storm 3 years ago. The sequel is now out and if you want to try it out head on over to Iron Helmet Games to start playing now for free!

It's a long-term, epic, space game where your fleets take hours to arrive at distant stars. This grand strategy game is reminiscent of Diplomacy where the gameplay is very simple and a large part of the fun comes from diplomatic relations with other players. In short this game is one of the most refined forms of nerd-crack I have ever encountered. I do love it so.


My friend has a premium account so has set up the game with a few fun features:

  • Extra Anonymity - no-one knows who anyone is.
  • Dark Galaxy - you can only see stars within scanner range.
  • Production every 20 ticks - A tick is one hour and using the non-standard 20 hour production cycle forces players to check in at different times as the game progresses.
  • Trade Scanned - you can only trade with races you have met (well scanned).
  • Scanning Technology Lvl 2 - in a dark galaxy it helps to be able to see.

The Players

Part of the fun of this game compared to Diplomacy is that you can play it without knowing who your opponents are. So below are my opponents (and me) and, while I do have my theories, for now I don't know who is who out of my friends*:

The Spanish Inquisition

Their wry smile hides many thoughts as they stare deep into your soul with their double-stacked eyes. No-one else realises it is because they are listening to dry space comedy on their headphones.

Neptune's Revenge

Adherents of the Religion of the Blue†, this race of Grey Aliens are fans of Tron, movies in which Samuel L. Jackson is eaten by sharks and Smurfs. They mostly inhabit watery worlds and tan themselves between bloody battles for supremacy.


Due to low Charisma scores caused by their insectoid appearance the other races often treat this race poorly. It is not surprising that they do not trust the other races at all. Except for maybe their sister race.

Solemnity of Manner

Without lips to communicate normally it is no wonder that this race appears solemn to outsiders. In truth, they are constantly communicating telepathically which is actually pretty annoying and gives them their sullen look.

The Tide

This race wanted an imposing name but since "The Flood" was already taken they were forced into a less inspiring name choice. These slow slug-like creatures like to move inexorably towards their foes and their bark is worse than their bite. They don't have any teeth after all.

Limiting Factor

Much like their sister race this race's looks have limited their interaction with other races who find them intimidating. They have turned it to their advantage with their mighty red warships acting as the scourge of the galaxy.


Adherents of the Religion of the Purple†, this race of Greys like songs by Prince, movies with Samuel L Jackson as a Jedi and Ribena. They are mostly found sneakily dying the waters around on Neptune's Revenge's home planet with red food colouring.

*I have made up a lot of crazy backstories about these races as, currently, not much has happened in game. In future posts their actual personalities will show through. The races are in the order (left-to-right) that they appear in the game. 

†Their in-game colour.

The Story

I'm going to write up the events of the game once it is all complete (from my perspective, maybe with some guest spots from my fellow players). I'd love to write it up as the game progresses but it would give away my strategies and who I am to my fellow players.


We've only been playing a few days and I've already had a restless night worrying about my fleet movements, where my construction and research options lie, etc.. I have the bug and it's only going to get worse as we continue to play. My friend who introduced me to the game took the mick out of me in the following way when he heard:

Admiral: Commander, report!
Commander: Admiral, it’s been five minut-
Admiral: Report!
Commander: No change, sir, excepting that any fleets in transit are five minutes closer to their destinations. There have been no new messages. Intel suggests that fighting has broken out elsewhere in the galaxy, but... Really, sir, you should get some sleep.
Admiral: What about the research arm? Have there been any breakthroughs?
Commander: SLEEP, Admiral. You know Fleet Science’s latest estimate was for more than a day away, now don’t make me ask the doctor to order you to bed on medical grounds.
Admiral: Buh- but my gratification!

Stay tuned for future posts when the diplomacy fails, the fleets clash and friendships are tested!

Tom Out!